Sunday, January 25, 2015

Royal Rumble Results as Described by the Cat

SPOILER BREAK


Match #1: New Age Outlaws vs. The Assertion
Cutting up veggies and slicing steak thin

Max: Oh? Steak huh? We haven't seen that in a while.  What a throwback, we ALWAYS know steak is good.  It's a classic dish.  Good job, we are off to a good start.

Match #2: Miz and Mizdow vs. USOs
Pans are preheating, making cheese sauce

Max: This is boring and I'm over it. But I can smell the meat and I want it more because I can't have it.  WHERE IS THE RUMBLE? I mean the meat!

Match #3: Paige & Nattie vs. Bellas
Meat is on the pain, starting to simmer while onions caramelize.

Max: That smells good and I WANT IT ALL IN MY MOUTH RIGHT NOW.

Match #4: Cena/Lesnar/Rollins
Plating food and eating, giving Max nuggets of steak.

Max: WHAT?! WHAT?! OMG I WANT IT ALL! THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER! NOM NOM NOM I LOVE IT! I NEVER EVER EVER WANT IT TO END! DESTROY IT!!!!! THE HUMANS ARE GLUED TO THE TV! I EAT ALL THE STEAK IN THE PAN! NOM NOM NOM!

Match #5: The Rumble
Digesting. 

Max: UGH this food is so good.  I could eat this all night. Aww I love it. Wait, had to much. Not feeling good.  Going to audibly cry to get humans attention. No wait, too late. PUKE.

Post Show
Max: *Distant scratching in litter box.*

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